SPORT, White Sox season that wasn't

John Rice has a funny column in the Forest Park Review.

The unintentionally funny part is that the White Sox could win the World Series--I still can't believe it--and the team's ace pitcher, Mark Buerhle, can't even get his name spelled right in the paper.

Opening Day – Burleigh wins 1-0 but beer venders complain that the game lasted less than two hours. Burleigh is not allowed to pitch any more home games....

July 1—Distraught by their poor first half pitching, Jose Contreras and Orlando Hernandez climb into a dinghy in Burnham Harbor and start paddling back to Cuba....

October 21—Sox face Astros in World Series. TV sets click off across America. Umpires announce that they will make sure the Sox don’t throw the Series again by giving them every call....